My max has perfect 50/50 weight distribution, with 200 lbs of fire wood in the trunk. The car no longer gets tail happy, it just sticks to the road.

 

But now your slower than the average Max.

 

I get the same results with a dead body...

 

 

Yeah, but with the summer heat coming, you might need 5 or 6 of those pine tree air fresheners. Ewwwwwwwww!

 

hmm....if you have the trunk liner that comes with the meridian package...it may be ok

 

No meridian package, just an old blanket to keep the mess to a minimum.

 

too much Soprano watching going on, I hope nobody is making any runs to the New Jersey Pine Barrens.

 

Hmm... i'm sold...

how much does this new lumber mod cost??

Can you install it youself?

Anyone know where I can find installation instructions... pictures???


-Tom Z.

 

Just returned from the pine barrens, car is alot lighter.

 

Man...this thread is giving me ideas...I'm gona offer to drive people to work in the winter...but they will just have to ride in the trunk!

 

Here's a pic of a similar kit. You've got to love the performance it adds!!



For details see the following page: http://www.punkdork.net/lumber/default.htm.

 

 

I doubt if 200 lbs will do it, but do you like the cars' stance with the front end high and rear end low?
You probably have an extra 2 inches above the top of the front tires to the wheel well arch.
Has to look strange.
Plus that wieght will slow you down and eat gas.

 

We've determined that it takes 200 lbs. to accomplish the 50/50 weight distribution thanks to edadams. So, perhaps a 150lbs body and 50lbs of pine lumber could accomplish the same thing. The off-setting smells of pine and death could provide a perfect environment for aggressive driving.

 

We could probably use the body as some sort of padding to keep the lumber from sliding all over the place, thus preventing unnecessary weight transfer which might hinder performance.

 

We might need to distribute various parts of the body around the truck, strategically, to accomplish that. Do you have Visio installed? Perhaps you could diagram it out. Put it on the "How-To" sticky to help everyone accomplish this mod.

 

The only problem with this, punkdork, is that over time, the body will become less and less of an absorber and just begin to break down and make a big mess of everything.

 

We could put the body parts in some sort of sealed bag. You know the food saver/vacuum sealer thing they show on informercials? Who's up for a group buy!?!?

 

EURO-SEAL!!!! I always wanted one. If we do a group buy, maybe we can all get a free EURO-OPEN...that funky can opener. This is great. Let's make this happen.

 

Instructions:
1. Find suitable tree.
2. Cut and split wood.
3. Stack neatly in trunk.

 

1. Is the 16 oz. drink container on the rim of the trunk part of the modification?

2. Where is the dead body?

 

And do you have to drive with your trunk open? Any Five-o stopped you yet?

 

u guys are sickening

 

:Police....aright...thats it...I am turning all you punks in....

 

for what?? performance mods?? first NOS, now we kant have 50/50 weight distribution....

 

Hmm...wonder if I could do that on my Accord, too?? I think I might need a bit more wood in the back though because the Accord V6 is slightly more front-end heavy than the Maxima.

I do have a trunk liner...

 

I can't see how this is a make-specific modification.

Gentlemen, we may have just found the first performance-enhancing modification that can be applied across all makes and models, other than a Type-R sticker . Alert the presses. Stevepake here will be our Honda rep and we can spread the word, WORLDWIDE!

Maybe Stillen will distribute a new product for us...I'm taking name ideas. My first idea is the "Stillen DeadPine Suspension." Maybe JetChip will do a chip upgrade to further enhance the performance of the vehicles upgraded to 50/50 weight distribution through this system.

Sorry, Steve...had to let that comment out about the Type-R sticker...I mean, you are on the Maxima board.

 

I wonder how much stillen would charge for the lumber mod?

 

Probably $199.00 plus $350.00 shipping and handling.

 

Group buy?

 

Hmmm... it would seem that rigor mortis has set in. This could pose a problem when going to close the trunk. On second thought, a good hard shove or two (or three, or four) with the deck lid should solve this.

 

You guys are nuts.

 

Then there was that day at the beach... man that guy REALLY pi$$ed me off! Ha! Look at him now! ... nyuk-nyuk

BTW, the sand not only helps with the weight issue but it also helps keep "things" from rolling around back there. Packs it nice-n-tight.

 

gosh u guys are crazy!! hahha

 

this thread is getting too wierd

 

Hahah! If wee keep it up we might be able to rival the VWVortex lumber!

 

I like the sand, it can absorb all loose body fluids.

 

I think sand is too messy though...maybe if we just pour concrete over the body...that way we can eliminate the smell and fix it from moving around!

 

One Jimmy Hoffa Special, comin' right up...