You know you're TOO intersted in going to the track when...
03-11-2003, 11:33 AM
#1
You know you're TOO intersted in going to the track when...
...courtesy of www.racerchicks.com - with some editing...
- You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
- You take your helmet along when you go to buy new eyeglasses or check out cars (seats).
- You feel compelled on a road trip to beat your previous best time.
- You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing depth (wear bars showing).
- When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you just saved.
- When you hear 'overcooked it', instead of food you think 'off the track'.
- You change engine oil every other week.
- You sometimes hear little noises from your passengers when you get on the throttle right after turning in.
- You thoroughly enjoy showing the tailgater behind how to drive around a highway off-ramp.
- Your racing budget is one of the big three -- mortgage, car payments/maintenance, dating.
- Your email address refers to your car rather than to you.
- You walk proper lines through the grocery store.
- You've been known to yell "It means 'check your mirrors' dammit!" at your television.
- You buy new parts because you don't know where you put the spares.
- You measure all family acquisitions in terms of the number of race tires that could have been purchased.
- You look at the purchase of tools as a long term investment.
- Your partner says, "If you buy another set of tires, I'm getting jewellery."
- Your garage holds more cars than your house has bedrooms.
- You have enough spare parts to build another car.
- More than one performance supply house recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call.
- You have car parts in your cubicle at work.
- You think the last line of the Star Spangled Banner is: "Racers, start your engines!"
- If you can't remember when you last worked on weekdays and rested on weekends.
- You're registered for wedding gifts at AutoZOne, Canadian Tire and Racer Wholesale.
- Your Christmas list begins with another set of BFG R1's and Pauter rods (and your 'significant other' knows what these are).
- After your answer to "What did you do this weekend?" the next question is always: "And you do this for fun? Right?"
- You have a separate drawer for 'garage clothes'.
- Your reading material in your bathroom consists of auto parts and racing supply catalogs, several books written by famous drivers,
every book Carroll Smith has ever written.... and 400 car magazines, none of which have centerfolds and somewhere in the bunch is a Playboy.
- People know you by your class letter, car number, and car color.
- People know you by your "off"s". "Oh, you are the one stuck in the mud at ButtonWillow last weekend!"
- You talk to other cars on the road, calling them by the manufacturers name.
- Your criteria for selecting a significant other include auto repair skills. Air tools optional.
- Your family remembers your hair color as "grease".
- You plan your wedding around the race schedule.
- You astound the clerk at Sears by bringing in a snapped breaker bar every other week or so.
- You remember the dates and details of every race you've ever been in, but can't remember your phone number.
- You complain when cars in front of you on highway off-ramps don't stay on the line, causing your exit speed to drop.
- A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you query, "Synthetic or organic?" and they reply, "Vegetable or corn."
- You give out Summit Racing's number when a friend asks for the best hardware store.
- You refer to the corner down the street from your house as "Turn One."
- You look at the fire hydrant at that corner and see an apex marker.
- You enjoy driving in the rain on the way to work or school.
- You always late apex the intersection and try to pass a few cars coming out.
- Everywhere you go, you try to find the fastest line through the turn.
- You always do a toe & heel downshift while whoever might be your passenger gives you a real funny look.
- You can't stand anyone telling others how to drive. Of course, you are the best.
- You can't stand understeer.
- You always want to change something in your car to make it handle better.
- You will gladly pay up to $8 for a quart of engine oil.
- You hate long distance driving, but you will gladly drive 800 miles to the race track.
- You think that traction control and ABS are for those who can't drive.
- You save broken car parts as "mementos".
- Your last several freeway forays included just brushing the curbs as you apexed the on-ramps perfectly....
- You've found your lawn mower runs pretty good on 94 octane gas (but doesn't particularly care for alcohol).
- The local tire shop won't honor the tread life warranty on any car you have been within 50 yards of...
- The shop manager at your local car dealer mutters "dear Lord" under his breath after he sees the size of your exhaust piping.
- The local police and state Highway Patrol have a picture of your car taped to their dashboard.
- You spend more time polishing your exhaust tip every day than you do on your hair.
- Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have timeslips.
- You would choose a roll bar over air conditioning if it were an option.
- You enjoy driving through wet, empty parking lots and using the emergency brake to kick the back end out.
- White smoke coming out from under your tires is a common sight.
- You consider the redline a "conservative suggestion" and the rev limiter "a fun limiter"
- You spend more on insurance premiums than on food.
- When someone refers to "The Good Book", you think of "The Auto Math Handbook"
- When someone asks where you went to school, you reply, "Skip Barber".
- You have performance shops programmed on your speed dialer.
- You know the 1/4 mile times and skid pad numbers of your riding mower and want to improve them.
- You've embarrassed your significant other at least once by insisting on wearing your full face helmet while driving.
- You know the "racing line" of every turn in your daily commute, including your alternate routes, and practice hitting them every day.
- You quote your street tire wear life in weeks rather than miles.
- You regularly live test your rev limiter on that straight that's a little too long for 2nd but not worth going into 3rd for.
- You've started looking for sponsors for your daily commute.
- You've slalomed in a construction zone, and counted your penalty time in the rearview afterwards.
- After you tell your "signifigant other" where you'd like to go on your vacation they answer: "Why... is there a race there?"
...feel free to add your own...
- You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
- You take your helmet along when you go to buy new eyeglasses or check out cars (seats).
- You feel compelled on a road trip to beat your previous best time.
- You are happiest when your street car's tires are worn to racing depth (wear bars showing).
- When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you just saved.
- When you hear 'overcooked it', instead of food you think 'off the track'.
- You change engine oil every other week.
- You sometimes hear little noises from your passengers when you get on the throttle right after turning in.
- You thoroughly enjoy showing the tailgater behind how to drive around a highway off-ramp.
- Your racing budget is one of the big three -- mortgage, car payments/maintenance, dating.
- Your email address refers to your car rather than to you.
- You walk proper lines through the grocery store.
- You've been known to yell "It means 'check your mirrors' dammit!" at your television.
- You buy new parts because you don't know where you put the spares.
- You measure all family acquisitions in terms of the number of race tires that could have been purchased.
- You look at the purchase of tools as a long term investment.
- Your partner says, "If you buy another set of tires, I'm getting jewellery."
- Your garage holds more cars than your house has bedrooms.
- You have enough spare parts to build another car.
- More than one performance supply house recognizes your voice and greets you by name when you call.
- You have car parts in your cubicle at work.
- You think the last line of the Star Spangled Banner is: "Racers, start your engines!"
- If you can't remember when you last worked on weekdays and rested on weekends.
- You're registered for wedding gifts at AutoZOne, Canadian Tire and Racer Wholesale.
- Your Christmas list begins with another set of BFG R1's and Pauter rods (and your 'significant other' knows what these are).
- After your answer to "What did you do this weekend?" the next question is always: "And you do this for fun? Right?"
- You have a separate drawer for 'garage clothes'.
- Your reading material in your bathroom consists of auto parts and racing supply catalogs, several books written by famous drivers,
every book Carroll Smith has ever written.... and 400 car magazines, none of which have centerfolds and somewhere in the bunch is a Playboy.
- People know you by your class letter, car number, and car color.
- People know you by your "off"s". "Oh, you are the one stuck in the mud at ButtonWillow last weekend!"
- You talk to other cars on the road, calling them by the manufacturers name.
- Your criteria for selecting a significant other include auto repair skills. Air tools optional.
- Your family remembers your hair color as "grease".
- You plan your wedding around the race schedule.
- You astound the clerk at Sears by bringing in a snapped breaker bar every other week or so.
- You remember the dates and details of every race you've ever been in, but can't remember your phone number.
- You complain when cars in front of you on highway off-ramps don't stay on the line, causing your exit speed to drop.
- A neighbor asks if you have any oil, to which you query, "Synthetic or organic?" and they reply, "Vegetable or corn."
- You give out Summit Racing's number when a friend asks for the best hardware store.
- You refer to the corner down the street from your house as "Turn One."
- You look at the fire hydrant at that corner and see an apex marker.
- You enjoy driving in the rain on the way to work or school.
- You always late apex the intersection and try to pass a few cars coming out.
- Everywhere you go, you try to find the fastest line through the turn.
- You always do a toe & heel downshift while whoever might be your passenger gives you a real funny look.
- You can't stand anyone telling others how to drive. Of course, you are the best.
- You can't stand understeer.
- You always want to change something in your car to make it handle better.
- You will gladly pay up to $8 for a quart of engine oil.
- You hate long distance driving, but you will gladly drive 800 miles to the race track.
- You think that traction control and ABS are for those who can't drive.
- You save broken car parts as "mementos".
- Your last several freeway forays included just brushing the curbs as you apexed the on-ramps perfectly....
- You've found your lawn mower runs pretty good on 94 octane gas (but doesn't particularly care for alcohol).
- The local tire shop won't honor the tread life warranty on any car you have been within 50 yards of...
- The shop manager at your local car dealer mutters "dear Lord" under his breath after he sees the size of your exhaust piping.
- The local police and state Highway Patrol have a picture of your car taped to their dashboard.
- You spend more time polishing your exhaust tip every day than you do on your hair.
- Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have timeslips.
- You would choose a roll bar over air conditioning if it were an option.
- You enjoy driving through wet, empty parking lots and using the emergency brake to kick the back end out.
- White smoke coming out from under your tires is a common sight.
- You consider the redline a "conservative suggestion" and the rev limiter "a fun limiter"
- You spend more on insurance premiums than on food.
- When someone refers to "The Good Book", you think of "The Auto Math Handbook"
- When someone asks where you went to school, you reply, "Skip Barber".
- You have performance shops programmed on your speed dialer.
- You know the 1/4 mile times and skid pad numbers of your riding mower and want to improve them.
- You've embarrassed your significant other at least once by insisting on wearing your full face helmet while driving.
- You know the "racing line" of every turn in your daily commute, including your alternate routes, and practice hitting them every day.
- You quote your street tire wear life in weeks rather than miles.
- You regularly live test your rev limiter on that straight that's a little too long for 2nd but not worth going into 3rd for.
- You've started looking for sponsors for your daily commute.
- You've slalomed in a construction zone, and counted your penalty time in the rearview afterwards.
- After you tell your "signifigant other" where you'd like to go on your vacation they answer: "Why... is there a race there?"
...feel free to add your own...
06-17-2003, 08:06 PM
#10
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 139
I've got more:
- your friend asks how to take a turn and you reply sideways.
- you've done a 7+ second burnout in a stock 3'rd gen gxe WITHOUT the e-brake.
- you refuse to listen to the radio when driving because it uses up valuable engine power.
- you used advanced calculus to decide which wheels to get.
- you hate rice burners because they're too modest.
- you've gone on a diet to improve your lap times.
- you've used more than 3 full tanks of gas in a day.
- you've literally driven a circle around someone on the road.
- you've changed directions on a one lane road without stopping.
- you think a 360 is a good way to see if anyone's behind you.
- your friend asks how to take a turn and you reply sideways.
- you've done a 7+ second burnout in a stock 3'rd gen gxe WITHOUT the e-brake.
- you refuse to listen to the radio when driving because it uses up valuable engine power.
- you used advanced calculus to decide which wheels to get.
- you hate rice burners because they're too modest.
- you've gone on a diet to improve your lap times.
- you've used more than 3 full tanks of gas in a day.
- you've literally driven a circle around someone on the road.
- you've changed directions on a one lane road without stopping.
- you think a 360 is a good way to see if anyone's behind you.
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