Sit down, boys and girls, and I'll tell ya a story about my Maxima, a BMW, Interstate 35, circus midgets and whipped cream. ...And it's all true.


...Well, except about the part with the midgets and the whipped cream.

Anyway, a friend and myself were attending a semi-formal type gathering down in DeSoto (southern 'burb of Dallas), and the hour was getting late. It was about 1:30 am and I was driving-sober (I'm on a diet regimen where you don't get no Coke/Pepsi or booze...not that I'd drive trashed anyway...).

My buddy and myself are in the left lane of I-35E Northbound crusing in nonexistent traffic at about 75 mph. I spy in my auto-dimming rearview mirror (damn, those are cool) what appeared to be a BMW 3-series FLYING up on my bumper. Instead of going around me, he hovered five feet of my rear end. I looked over at my friend who simply asked, "Well, you gonna **** wit' 'im?" ...My reply?

"Yup."

A quick flick of the wrist into fourth, and a not-so-gentle application of the throttle, and Mister Beemer was taken by suprise when we shot away from him. He tried to keep up, as I watched his headlights pull up slightly as he accelerated, but I was steadily pulling away from him-not too fast, but it was noticeable and undeniable.

At 110, I'd pulled far enough away to make my point, so I let off the throttle and started coasting back down to speeds where the cops wouldn't request a helicopter to keep up with me.

I'm back down to about 80 when here comes "Hanz" in the Bimmer. He flys past me, so I decide to play catch-up. Snick-snick into fourth again, and I'm back at it.

He's pulling hard ahead of me, and I throw it into fifth. The gap closes. Snick-snick again, into sixth. Whoops, I'm passing right by him (slowly), and he's still running hard. As we pass, my buddy takes a good look at the car and the driver.

About 500 feet ahead of him, I finally glance down (and over) at the speedo. The needle is crawling past the 130 mark.

Hmm. Perhaps I should slow down. Yes. That would seem to be a good idea given that curve on I-35 by the Dallas Zoo is coming up-quite rapidly.

So I slowed down. I looked for the nicht shnell BMW behind me (and any po-po's) but was unable to spot him. Oh, well.

My buddy told be that he saw a 330Ci badge on the rear decklid-and it was a convertible. He also said that "Hanz" didn't look too thrilled as a passed him.

On we went through the downtown mixmaster, over to Central Expressway, and off at Mockingbird. Being that the quasi-formal party had frilly food (read: cheeze and crackers) we stopped at the Taco Bell on Mockingbird for some munchies relief. As we pulled out of the drive-thru, what did I spy in the parking lot but a rather familiar 3-series BMW. I pull over to it, and talked to "Hanz", whos real name turned out to be Mike. Pretty cool guy, he'd stuck a Dinan chip in his Bimmer, and was absolutely amazed/impressed with the Max. He kept saying "I know they got lots of horsepower, but...damn!"



Said good night and took off.

Okay, that's it. If you've made it this far, thanks...I tend to bloat stories. I mean, I coulda just said:

On '35 Saturday night. Blew away some dude in a 330Ci. Film at 11.

But that woulda been too easy.

 

I love good stories with happy endings.

 

Your sig name suits you!

Nice story.

 

Nice kill. That is the kind of thing that makes me believe that my decision to puchase a Max is the right one. Let me guess, you are doing the Atkins diet. It works very good, but it is hard not having carbs. Good luck with it.

 

...plus, his story is a good segway into what I have to post...check the board!

 

Well worth the wait. Ni-i-i-i-ce kill!

Hope those Beemer guys don't whine as much about loosing to a Maxima as the Acura/Honduh guys do! Let the flames begin!

 

You cant have coke beacuse you're on a diet, but you ate Taco Bell???

 

protein.

 

This story just brings tears to my eyes. No, really I'm glad to hear that, as much as i like BMW's, in real life, when confronted with a Max, another one bites the dust. After reading the whole story, I'm convinced that we need to have a Dallas meet. Any takers out there? By the way, great story. Congratulations on the 6spd.

 

That's awesome! I bought my 2k2SE a week and half ago and having a real hard time holding out on the hard driving until the 1000 mile mark. I can totally relate to your story though because last Friday I was in the Dallas area getting the Armourfend 3M Clear Bra put on and seriously couldn't believe how many people with BMW's and Lexus's couldn't help but @#$K with me. I could hardly keep my cool. It was like they all had to justify to themselves that spending 30K+ was the way to go. Boy oh boy I can't wait!

Great Story!

 

when some of Dallas' finest throw in jail for 100+, don't tell your new room mates to call you Hollywood..

Man.. you guys are nutz. Or I am a serious wuss. When I hit 90, I start getting painfully paranoid.

The one time I've been over 100 in the max was in TX. I dont think I passed anyone or anyone passed me :/ but .5 mile after I slowed down there was a State Trooper. scary. that would have ruined my otherwise nice trip.

 

this would make a one hell of Maxima commercial..you know, how BMW makes movies for their car commercials? now it's our turn..

 

True but if he could have fit the midgets and the whipped cream into the story I'd be impressed 101%

 

Midgets and whipped cream aside, I like BMWs a lot. Before I had my first Max (a grey '89 SE) I had an '85 325 with the eta motor.

I loved driving it-a small, nimble rear-wheel drive car with a decent motor. The problem was it was a total chunk of poop. I ended up:

1. Replacing the motor (timing belt broke-and it was a close tolerance engine).

2. Rebuilding the tranny (massive slippage AND seepage).

3. Replacing the steering rack.

4. Replacing the driveshaft (out of balance and cracked).

5. Rebuilding the rear suspension (shocks punched THROUGH the rear wheelwell).

Even though the car was a complete turd, when it was running, it was a blast to drive. And I still get a full-on chubby for any M5 I spy.


Mike (the 330Ci driver) said he had an automatic. I'd be interested to see how I would have done against a 330Ci that was a coupe with a 5-speed.

And hey, who said I ate at the Bell? My buddy was hungry. Not on the Adkins diet, but basically all I'm eatin' is fish, and steamed veggies and rice-it'll lower the body fat percentage on my lazy ***.

But damn, I want a burger baaaad.